My Brother's Boyfriend
by RandomlyYours
Summary: For someone like Sasuke, seeing his brother nail his best friend isn't the best thing to stumble into. Or his girlfriend's sister and her girlfriend. Or his two friends. And his parents wonder why he needs therapy.


**Summary**: For someone like Sasuke, seeing his brother nail his best friend isn't the best thing to stumble into. Or his girlfriend's sister and her girlfriend. Or his two friends. And his parents wonder why he needs therapy.

**A/n** - Well, someone asked me if Sasuke knew about Itachi and Naruto and I pondered this. Then I saw a deviant art where Sasuke walks onto Naruto and Itachi having sex! It's a doujinshi by Goettia, but this isn't the plot AT ALL. So no accusations of plagiarism.

**Warnings**: Yaoi, A.U yuri Sasuke being scarred for life and also, Sasuke being straight. It's not at ALL canon my dear but it :Sniffle: it had to be done! For the sake of the plot. Which is quite funny I think.

**Disclaimer**: Kishimoto is being stubborn. I just wanted Naruto, but I couldn't get him! Damnit. So I don't own Naruto

**Title** my brother's boyfriend

**Pairings**: Itachi/Naruto

* * *

Sasuke's P.O.V.

There are a few things in life left that shock me. One time was when I caught Haruno Sakura, my former stalker and now one of my best-friends and Yamanaka Ino, another former stalker and the blondest girl in our school (being Japan it wasn't that hard) making out behind the school bushes. If I was any normal straight guy, I'd have a nosebleed.

Don't get me wrong. As a guy, I still think lesbians making out and discarding each others clothes is very, very attractive, I have several reasons as why I didn't faint from a extreme blood loss.

One, Sakura while looking pretty much defenseless hits really, really hard. As in, you can't get up for quite a while.

Two, I am happily dating one Hyuuga Hinata, much to my parent's anger. After all, Hinata is the heiress to Hyuuga Corporation and Uchiha Incorporated and them don't have the best history. I receive enough attention to keep my libido happy, thank you very much.

Three, well I have a bad track record with stumbling on homosexual couples making out, and sometimes doing much, much worse.

Once again, don't think I'm a homophobe. My other best friend, Uzumaki Naruto is dating my brother. But back to the bad luck streak I have.

One time, I was walking to gym, where I heard murmurs of "Icha-Icha Paradise" and "Pervert". I knew right away that my gym teacher, Hatake Kakashi was most likely reading his

infamous orange novels and someone finally proving he was late on purpose.

I looked into the shed window and when Kakashi-sensei came later, I realized his excuse of 'Playing with the dolphin' wasn't exactly an excuse.

If you can call Umino Iruka-sensei giving Kakashi-sensei a French kiss 'playing'.

I don't.

After that, I was meeting up with Hinata for a meeting with her father, Hiashi. Hinata was stopped by her father and she sent me up to talk to Neji, her cousin and my friend. A maid had stopped me to say that Sabaku Gaara was most likely studying with him.

I knocked at the door for a bit, but no one answer. I opened the door to see a tied up and half clothed Neji and a smirking Gaara. I blushed as bright as panda-boy's hair.

That's when I learned the many, many purposes of sand.

If that wasn't enough, I went to my other friend's home, Abarame Shino. He was a sensible guy, and last time I checked, asexual. His other friend, Inuzuka Kiba also was rumored to have a crush on MY Hinata a while back, so I thought I was safe from seeing anything.

Well, in a way I guess I didn't exactly stumble on them.

No, no. Shino's house-wide speaker system was set off when Shino and Kiba were having kinky sex on the desk. Turns out Kiba's an uke. I know, I was shocked too. They also were using flavored condoms, and were doing it doggy style. It was then that I left the house.

There's only so much a straight male can take before it gets a tad bit too much.

There wasn't even anyone I could complain to. Hinata would think it was 'cute'.

Then, it was Kabuto and Orochimaru-sensei. Well. Turns out everyone was right. He is a perverted snake pedophile (actually, Kabuto's 18 so he's legal) who enjoys the fact he has a freaky long tongue.

I needed about three weeks therapy for that little mistake of asking Ororchimaru-sensei if the chem test was in two days or three days.

I also failed the test. (Well, it was an eighty, but for me it was a failing grade)

I haven't even told you half about what's happened to me, but I think I'll wrap it up with the worst one I've ever experience. And with Itachi and Naruto acting like rabbits, it won't be the last. It's only time before Naruto admits to Itachi he's a fan of gags, blindfolds and handcuffs.

I'm not even going into why Naruto told me.

Worst part? Itachi's confessed to me he wants to do that and SO much more to Naruto.

So, I was walking down the main hallway when there was a burglary. I was right outside

Itachi's door and the metal gate slammed right in front of me. I knocked on Itachi's door and tried to enter but it had been locked by the alarm.

Anyways, it was then, I heard things.

"...Ngh, Itachi! It hurts!"

"Sssh...it's ok, it's ok. Tell me when it stops and I'll make you feel real good."

I hear a little feminine whimper and a quiet question. "Itachi, will it always feel this hard?"

I hear kissing sounds and my brother speaks. "Only the first time Naru-chan. Next time, it'll be better, I promise..."

"AAH! I-I-I Tachi-kun!"

It was then I realized that my brother and Naruto were having sex for the first time.

Which was quite long, they had been dating for about five months.

Anyways, the alarm stops and the door that I was banging my head against in order to perfom selective amnesia collapses.

I see them doing it for about a minute until I blush redder then any shade ever imagined and rush out. My brother or Naruto never even heard me coming.

Then again, over Naruto's cries it must have been a bit hard.

So, this is why as soon as I see Sakura and Ino making out, I rush out to find Hinata.

Then I see Naruto being nailed into the wall by my brother.

Again.

The universe has it out for me, I'm not joking. And that's making me miserable.  
ARGH.

Now it's Temari and TenTen!

* * *

**A/N** - Not what I usually write. It's meant to be a sequel to 'The Ring' but I think that it can be alone as well. Never fear, I still place SasuNaru first in my heart.  
Closing note: No, that wasn't perverted at all was it? How did you like my first sorta-lime? 


End file.
